Thursday, September 11, 2008

Sarah Palin - High School Confidential

Okay, so now the news comes that Wetbrain McCain is enjoying an enormous surge in popularity with women thanks to his selection of Caribou Barbie as running mate. Which leads me to conclude that a lot of women really ARE as stupid as sexist men make them out to be.

Or maybe it's this: Back in High School I figured out there were two kind of popular girls - the kind who were popular because they were pretty, came from rich families (they could afford to dress well) were reasonably bright and turned out to be, once I put aside my deeply ingrained mistrust of, and general loathing for anything that typified "all-American values" genuinely nice people - decent, wittier than you'd expect, kinder than you'd expect and more than a little savvy about the Game that is American life. Then, you had the other "popular" girl - the pretty one who was popular because despite the fact that she wasn't that smart, wasn't that savvy, wasn't that nice and wasn't that witty. What Popular Girl Number 2 had, however, was that visceral, animal instinct for tapping into that part of her adolescent cronies that is a roiling pit of insecurity desperate for validation. Popular Girl Number 2 was, in short, a scary bitch who had perfected a subtle form of terrorism and set herself up for life as Arbiter of All Things Cool and Not, at least for spineless, lame girls who saw self-worth only in the approval of others - other men, other women, their pastor, whatever.

Sarah Palin strikes me as that kind of gal. Mediocre in every respect and damn proud of it, she's the kind of person who makes you feel like her best friend as long as you don't step out of line. Stepping out of line would include: questioning her opinions, assuming that you're in a relationship of equals, excelling or doing something to draw attention to yourself, or holding a different opinion from hers. I can't imagine what kind of hell it must be to be part of her family or social group - always knowing that one false move can send you to Siberia, which, as she reminds us, is really closeby to her state.

The kind of American women who are excited by Sarah Palin are the kind of American women who, as American teens, would put up with anything for approval and wouldn't dream of questioning the established order. Or they're Camille Paglia, who seems to have this unbridled admiration for women who get places by sucking up to men and trading on their sexuality. Maybe women like that just make Camille hot, sort of like when you get liberal guys to admit that well, okay, maybe Ann Coulter is kind of disgusting, but they'd really like to screw her. I understand: I had the hots for Charlton Heston when I was kid...

Just remember one thing, Ladies, this broad hunts wolves from a helicopter and hunts moose with a machine gun...If that doesn't tell you anything, then go ahead and vote for her and decide how you want your hair done when your empty head is mounted on a plaque hanging above a fireplace in some hunting lodge.

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